Aug 13, 2020

Alzheimer's Disease, Covid, Losing A Loved One.



A few days ago we laid a dear loved one to rest. We are all a little sadder and life will change because she is gone. The main thing that keeps us stable is our knowledge that she truly is in a far better place. God gives us this to live on and we will. Plus she was a person that lived life to the fullest and would expect no less from us!


Our loved one Jacquelyn was something else in this life.  She was so full of love, sweetness, and beauty. People who knew her will love her forever because she made an impression on all who met her. One that lives on.

She was a strong independent woman long before women's liberation took place. It wasn't one that she wanted to be, it was thrust upon her. Sometimes life throws unhappy circumstances and you have no say in the matter.

What do you do when this happens?

You either fall flat, sit in misery, or pick yourself up and go on. She went on to become a much stronger person. Went to beauty school carved out a career one that lasted over 50 years!


She may not have done everything right (who does), but keep in mind she was a forerunner in women with careers when others were stay-at-home mothers or wives. Women didn't automatically go out of the home at those times to have a career.

The rare ones that did were either nurses, teachers, or secretaries. She became a hairdresser and made people look their glamorous best. She had a formal outlook on life and gave that to others. She inspired others to be their very best and not in a plain jane way. She inspired beauty, charm, and self-esteem in all!

Her last sign which I loved it looked so much like her!

She loved her career and was very proud of her accomplishments when so few women were out in the workforce.

There was much more to this woman, but sometimes I don't think she realized that. She was so genuinely loving and so beautiful. She cared deeply for others. 

I enjoyed being with her always. She was just plain fun to be around. Many enjoyed visiting her over the years.

Her son and I married in the early seventies those were strange times. Women's Liberation was in full force. She was a mentor of sorts for a young lady such as myself growing up in those times.

Life took me away so I missed many years being with her. Then one day once again we were family. Sadly this time Alzheimer's Disease was taking her away. I came back just in time to see the old Jacquelyn disappearing. Our days together were spent going to doctors' offices and trying to absorb all the changes that were taking place in her. I became the daughter she never had and the girls became new granddaughters.

We all became her bookkeepers, life organizers, housekeeper, chefs you name it we did it.


Alzheimer's is an awful disease. You lose your loved one way before they actually die. The worse thing I/we endured was a complete personality change for quite a few years.


The fun-loving, glamorous, smiling, and the beautiful woman began to disappear. She became very agitated for no reason. That change was hard to take.

In time that became less of a problem and she actually became almost child-like in her demeanor.


You can research and know the reasons for the changes, but that doesn't make it much easier. It is hard to take the changes mood swings and constant care as the disease makes changes to the complete body not just the mind. Living with those changes is hard no matter what information you have on the subject.

COVID-19 how did it affect us? She contacted it in assisted living. It and her health conditions were more than her little body could handle.  Like most with loved ones that are in assisted living, it made us sad. We were unable to visit and when you could it would be at a distance through a fence or at a window. Chuck said the worst thing was not being able to explain to this social butterfly the reason he/we couldn't come in to see her. He has said many times, "If only I could go in hug her tell her I love her, and kiss her on her cheek."

She lost her battle but has moved on to her Heavenly Home and knowing that has made all the difference to us and her family. She is again smiling happy and her beautiful loving self. We know this. We said goodbye sadly, but with joy in our hearts we know she is in a far better place

We had a private funeral because of the COVID circumstances. Cousin Fred Fryar officiated at the funeral.

I thought I'd share the video below which was from his church's sermon last Sunday. It may help you or someone you know in these trying times. He was with us here in our time of need and we thank him.


Trials ~ This Too Shall Pass
Pastor Fred Fryar
Jacquelyn's nephew


We want to thank all who have had her in your prayers. It truly meant a lot to us! We are also thankful to our Lord for giving us the strength to put one foot in front of the other and to carry on.  He does that you know.


Take care all!



8 comments:

  1. I know your MIL is rejoicing in Heaven! That fact does bring comfort.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Can you imagine? I know that's true. You're right and I know you too have experienced the same comfort.
      Dolly

      Delete
  2. The healing began when the Lord called her home. It is hard to let go of the ones you love but knowing where she is now gives that special peace in your heart that a lot of people will never feel. I know it is well with your soul but your heart still hurts.
    Praying
    Lisa

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Well put Lisa. It did begin then and is a true blessing. Yes it is hard for us here but you're so right about the peace. Thank you for the prayers sweet friend.
      Dolly

      Delete
  3. Jacquelyn, Was blessed with a beautiful family. So sorry for your loss. Bless you, xoxo, Susie

    ReplyDelete
  4. I am sorry to hear of your MIL ‘s passing. The sorrow your husband must have felt in not being able to see like wanted, I could not put in words. What the politicians have done to society and our loved ones, they will have to answer for. She is in a much better place and with a better body and mind. She knows how much she was loved here on earth .

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yes, so many are being affected. It is a sad situation for sure. We just took a ride and are doing pretty well. Chuck is doing very good now. We've put it in God's hands for sure.

      Delete


HOUSE AND GARDENS